http://www.ThisOldHouse.com

As I noted in Piss, Puke and Porn after I bought  my new old house I allowed the prior owners to rent it back from me for a number of months while my marital home was on the market.  During this time I worked mostly on the outside of the house.

It needed it.

I saw this home and had to have it. I’m crazy that way.

When it got closer to move-in time I did do some work/planning inside the house.

It needed it.

The Kitchen

One fine day I was in the kitchen measuring, trying to come up with a plan to remodel the kitchen which, again, was nasty –I mean  it had stained, smelly carpet —  IN THE KITCHEN!   Once white ceiling tiles which were  brown from cigarette smoke and water damage,  and the kitchen boasted a lovely exposed toilet pipe,  etc.  But I was financially challenged and wasn’t sure how I was going to be able to afford all the home renovations needed at one time.   I briefly considered trying to live with the kitchen “as is’ for a while.   (Of course, after removing the carpet and massive cleaning and disinfecting.)

Makes you want to cook, right?

During the rental period, the matriarch of the family, bless her heart, had become ill.  She was staying in a hospital bed in the front room (the hallway was too small to get a bed upstairs).  Her common law daughter-in-law (the one living upstairs with Piss Man) was her primary caretaker. See  What Happened In My House?  Murder?   The daughter-in-law seemed to want to befriend me. I can talk to anybody, really, so we were chatting it up.  Mind you, this was before the discovery of The Piss Collection.

But then something happened.

Piss Man’s Girlfriend had gone to check on the Matriarch. I stayed in the kitchen, pondering — what to do with this mess?   Then, Piss Man’s Girlfriend returned with a full  bed pan and proceeded to empty it —  into the kitchen sink — INTO THE KITCHEN SINK !!!!

EWWWWWWW!

She did this right in front of me!!!

My hopes of my family using the existing kitchen for a while and thus staggering the home renovations were dashed, or should I say splashed down the kitchen sink.  A kitchen sink currently being used and surrounded by dishes and food.

Ew.

When the family  moved out  of my new old house, the entire kitchen — including the kitchen sink — was demolished by a friend and I — within days.  We lived for four months with no kitchen at all.  But I’d rather have no kitchen at all than —-

Just Me With . . . The Ever Popular “Toilet — Kitchen Sink Combination.”

Related:   What Happened in My House, Murder? 

and  That Hoarders Smell

and Exhumation by Accident — Be Careful What You Dig For